How are you? ...Fair

Several months ago I got stuck in a work elevator with a really weird guy...just the two of us. Awkward. This guy delivers inner office mail so I see him every so often. There is definitely something "off" with this guy but I try my best to be friendly because I'm scared he's going going to kill me. So, I hop on the elevator and give him the old head nod to which he completely ignores me. I wait a few seconds and then ask, "how are you today?" The guy pauses for like 3 seconds so I think either he didn't here me, which is virtually an impossibility, or he's ignoring me again. Then, out of the blue, he responds with, "Fair!" I know what your thinking, "why is there an exclamation after the word fair?" The reason is he because he didn't just inform me how he's feeling, he declared it, "Fair!" It sounded like he was answering a mulitiple choice question but he was emphatic about it. What a weirdo. I had nothing to say at this point so we just stood there awkwardly while I balled my fist waiting for him to strike. He never did but it almost would have been more comfortable if he had.

So, a few weeks later, I'm waiting for the elevator. The doors open and there he is, creepy guy, but this time there was a woman in the elevator with him. I almost turned and walked away but a voice inside me told me to hop right in..."it will be alright." I later regretted this decision. Again, there were a few seconds of awkward silence. I selected my floor and a positioned myself against the far wall. Just then, creepy guy broke the silence. He leaned into the woman and said, "you smell good." She turned and forced a thank you but I could see her discomfort. I wanted to hold her, console her, tell her everything would be fine...but, frankly I was just as scared. Just then, the door opened and we all scattered. I know this sounds like I'm making this up but you really have to see this guy to believe what I'm telling you. He's not retarded and he's not disabled but something is wrong. Do you know what I'm saying, people? Like, he's disturbed enough that you can't blame him for being weird but he's not retarded so you can't be like, "oh, that guy...he's retarded." He's just weird...something is wrong.

Today, I encountered creepy guy once again. This guy is always hanging out by the elevators! It's the only place I ever see him...ever! I walked to the elevators and there he was, just standing against the wall. In my mind I'm thinking, stairs...stairs...stairs...just ignore him. Instead, I offered a "how ya doing?" He completely ignored. I can't figure this guy out and I don't want to anymore. I'm just not going to acknowledge him eer again. You win, creepy guy.

A few months ago, I wrote a blog http://jonmumma.blogspot.com/2006/05/lets-catch-up.html about Rory Scovel where I told DC to "enjoy him now because he won't be around forever. Well, that day has come...sooner than some expected. Our little guy is all grown up now and is leaving to bring chuckles to Canada. I'm proud of Rory in a really gay sort of way. I'm proud he's my friend, I'm proud of his ability, and I'm proud of the fact that he believes in himself and what he's doing; the entire DC comedy community should be as well. Next week he'll be gone and I wish him the very best. Remember in "Good Will Hunting" when Ben Affleck tells Matt Damon that the best part of his day is when he pulls in front of his house to pick him up for work and Matt Damon doesn't come out right away and for a second Affleck think he's left for good? That is kind of how I feel about Rory and some of my other DC comedian friends. The selfish part of me wants to continue seeing Rory every week at local shows. The other part of me wishes Rory would leave and not come back, unless he's headlining the Warner Theatre...it's time to share him with the rest of the world.

Best wishes, Rory!